Burlingame - the Fifth Circle of Hell

Love the bay area. Love. Burlingame? Not so much. Seems to be a city constructed entirely of hotels, and B-grade chain restaurants (elephant bar? I thought they went out of business 10 years ago! El Torito? El fucking Torito?!).

Surreality abounds this weekend, and to top it all off I rushed from friends' house to the airport and shut my eyes for justaminnit and woke up at SFO. And now...trapped in Burlingame. Forget Escape from New York; I'm busting out of this hellhole, asap.

Send candy. Or coconuts. Whichever.